and back to it!

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I went to the Dr. yesterday for a scan to make sure I was cyst free since starting my period, my last 3 cycles I had a cyst so I went in prepared to have to delay beginning this next round of IUI for 2 weeks but low and behold I WAS cyst free!!!

I'm starting my Femara tonight and after a lot of discussion we have decided to do a double insemination this round. It will use up the last of our donor sperm and if it doesn't work this time we will be switching donors. I'm a little anxious for this round since there is a lot at stake, it realistically could be our last cycle for a while if it doesn't work. We have pretty much depleted the money that we saved up for this purpose, not thinking it would take this long to conceive, so we will probably be waiting 6 months or so to recoup the funds if this time doesn't take.

Wish us luck!

was not proven wrong.

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As I'm sure you can guess since I haven't posted any fantastic news, that my official pregnancy test came back negative. To top off that fabulous news I started today AND am sick! Hopefully I will  be feeling better by tomorrow so that I can go for a scan and hopefully be cyst free and able to jump right in to our next cycle.

hoping to be proven wrong.

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I went to the Dr. this morning to get my blood drawn for my official pregnancy test. Now to wait. I am not very optimistic that I will be proven wrong since I took a HPT again yesterday and it too was negative, but I guess there is always a chance right?

Not the answer I was hoping for.

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My husband and I decided to take a HPT tonight cause we really didn't want to have to wait til Monday to find out if we were pregnant. I am day 14PIUI (post IUI) and our test came back negative, not even a hint of a second line.

I really don't know what to think or where to go from here but the husband is holding out hope that it's still too soon, I can't say I'm as optimistic. 5 failed IUI's and no incorrect HPT's yet. Guess we will see what Monday brings.

is something in the water?

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It's truly bittersweet to hear that so many of my friends and acquaintances are pregnant. While I am genuinely happy for them I can't help but feel a little jealous but also hopeful that on Monday I will get a positive test result. It seems like everyone around me is getting pregnant or just had babies, I'm sure this is just exacerbated by the fact that I have yet to be successful but it still seems like something is in everyone elses water and that I need to drink some!

One week to go!

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It's been just over a week and so far I haven't gone too crazy, one more week to go then we get an answer! Now we are just trying to decide if we want to take a HPT before going to the Dr's for bloodwork.

soooooo gross!

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So today I started my progesterone suppositories and ugh, I can only imagine this must be what it feels like when people use that monistat stuff for yeast infections. Luckily I did my research and learned that panty liners are the way to go but that being said, they make it no less gross! I have to call the Dr. tomorrow to figure out how long I have to use these for, I didn't pay attention on Saturday and missed that instruction apparently.

Other than that I feel great and have been reminding myself to drink tons of water, something I struggle with while I'm home (though I have no problem drinking 4 glasses or more when out at dinner somewhere!).

Let the TWW commence!

Today is the day!

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Started cramping early, early this morning and still feeling it thanks to the trigger shot, going to the Dr. in about an hour for our IUI! Feels like it's been a long road, though very short and easy in comparison to many others and I am very thankful for that. I'm ready to see if this time around works.

Wish me luck!

Saturday is the day!

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Went to the Dr. again today for my final scan and recieved my trigger shot so Saturday morning will be the day! *crossing fingers*
Dr. Also said he thought he saw what could be a small polyp on my scan today, he wasn't too worried about it but said that if this cycle didn't work that he would definitely reccomend looking at it more closely and seeing if it needs to be removed. Hopefully we wont have to worry about it.

almost there!

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Went to the Dr. today for another scan. Had 4 follicles on the right side! Only 2 were really mature but Dr. is hoping for 1 more. Waiting for them to call me about my hormone levels that they took this morning and then we will see if I will trigger today or wait another day or two. So excited to see if this time around works!

Holy hormones Batman!

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Wow... today has been an emotional day for no reason whatsoever. I have felt like bursting into tears all day long for no real reason. Missing my sister, sappy movie trailers, moments for no reason!

Hopefully this ends soon!

Is it a sign?

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Funny thing happened the other night...my DH took me out for sushi at our usual place and when the bill came I cracked up! The pen that came along with the bill was for none other than my OB/GYN's office! HAHA... is it a sign? Probably not but gave me a good laugh anyhow!

First Appointment since starting meds.

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Went in this morning for my first check up since starting Femara and Gonal-F, things looked good, still early as I expected. My lining needs to become a little thicker and I had 1 follicle at 12mm and 3 more around 10mm which will hopefully catch up to the big one. Going to continue on meds for at least a couple more days and probably see the Dr. again on Wed. or Thurs! Hopefully then it will be time to trigger *crossing fingers*

I feel great this cycle, so far haven't really had any side effects from the injectables and NONE from Femara which is great! Can't wait to see what the next few weeks have in store, hopefully something good.

I did it!

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I successfully gave myself my first injection last night! It wasn't a big deal at all and I hardly even felt it. I am feeling a little strange today, tired, a little crampy and have a slight headache. Not sure if this is due to the Gonal-F, Femara or something else.

I also created a Twitter account the other day, feel free to follow me! lifelongdream29

nervous about tonight.

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I start taking my Gonal-F injections tonight and I'm a little nervous, I was feeling really good about it when I went into the doctors for injection training but now I'm starting to doubt my ability to give myself the shots. Hopefully my husband will be able to do it if I find that I chicken out.

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Day 3 on Femara and I'm feeling good! No crappy side effects like I got on Clomid, I have been feeling a little tired but that probably has nothing to do with the medication. I start my injections tomorrow night and I'm a little nervous, at least the needle is small.

So far so good and feeling great about everything.

an exciting day...

Today I started my medication for this next cycle, feels great since I had a 2.5 month unexpected delay to starting this cycle.

Hopefully things will go smoothly and in a few weeks I will have good news to report.

one of these days I will learn.

One of these days I will learn that I cannot plan ANYTHING or count on ANYTHING to go the way I want it to in regards to my treatment.  One day I will learn this and therefore avoid the surprise, frustration, resentment and disappointment that comes with being ill prepared.

A little back story.... those of you who read this know that about a month ago we switched to an RE from my OB/GYN. On my last cycle with my OB/GYN I developed a cyst on my right ovary as a side effect of Clomid. She said it should be a one time thing since I had never had a problem with cysts before. The cyst went away later that month. Shortly after switching Dr's my husband and I went on vacation (before we could do a cycle) my RE suggested that I start birth control pills while on vacation so that I was ready to go when we get back and pretty much guaranteed to not have a cyst. I said no because I have never been on bc before and the idea of regulating my already very regular cycles scared me.

back to present time...

yesterday I had my cd3 baseline scan to make sure I was ready to start all of my meds and do our 5th insemination. My right ovary looked great, in a resting state just as my Dr. wanted..... then there was my left.... I have a fluid filled cyst measuring 28x19mm. Almost twice the size that is safe to begin treatment with. So as if in an "I told you so" moment I am now on bc pills for 2 weeks to get the cyst to at least shrink but hopefully go away entirely. Hopefully in two weeks I will be able to start my meds and get this train rolling out of the station but I'm trying not to let myself get too confident about that happening so that the universe doesn't feel the need to remind me again.

It's been a while...

wow, I haven't been on here in a while... Not to much has been going on. We went on vacation which was nice and now we are finally getting ready to begin our 5th cycle, our 1st cycle with our RE. I called today and ordered all of my meds so now it's really starting to feel real.

I'm really hoping that this is it and we will get the healthy little bundle of joy that we have been wanting so badly.

Lot's going on.

I had my first appointment today with the RE that we chose, went in for some blood tests and a follicle scan. He said that I had poly cycstic ovaries but NOT PCOS Thank god! Just that my ovaries produce more follicles than the average woman so he is going to have be a little more conservative with the stimulation so that I don't create too many follicles. We won't be going forward with this cycle because we are getting ready to go on vacation but it's on in August!

In other news... Our niece was born on Wed. night, she is 5lbs 12 ounces but totally healthy which we were concerned about. We are going to meet her next weekend. We also found out that 3 other people that we are fairly close to are pregnant. Hopefully it's in the water and I can get some of it LOL.

Other than that we haven't had a whole lot going on just enjoying the time that I had not counting my cycle days.